6 factors Contributing To Self-Sabotage And How To Overcome Them
We are all victims of our own self-sabotage. It is an irrevocable part of life, but sometimes it feels like a huge impairment especially when we are trying to achieve goals.
In this article, I will highlight 6 contributors and the actions we can take to reduce sabotage so we can lead more productive and fulfilling lives.
1. Procrastination
We are all guilty of procrastination. For some, it comes as you are about to start a task or a reluctance to continue. It is this ongoing defeatism, predominantly from a lack of motivation or an unclear vision. Or perhaps the task isn’t chunked into individual pieces and therefore you feel this overbearing weight from the entirety of the task.
When we find ourselves procrastinating the best solution is to look for the root cause. To ask oneself why? If the solution doesn't come immediately then take the time to work out the cause. This can be in itself one of the best solutions to resolving procrastination.
Recently I found myself procrastinating over a task and after asking myself why? I realised it was because I didn't know 100% what to do and therefore I delayed the task and continued to work on areas of the task that were already complete. My perfectionism taking over as well as a good dose of procrastination.
2. Perfectionism
Perfectionism is a big contributing reason to inner self defeatism. In your mind, you are saying to yourself this work isn't ready it’s not 100%. But actually, this mindset is incredibly detrimental to you firstly showing your work or secondly meeting deadlines.
In Austin Kleon’s book Show Your Work, he details documenting your life and explains that this process is never going to be 100%. When documenting life you want to show the imperfections, mistakes and your own vulnerability.
Furthermore, with aiming constantly for perfection, you are immediately setting yourself up for failure. We are taught to be kind to our fellow humans, but sometimes we need to be nicer to ourselves and reduce our own expectations.
3. Uncertainty
Another large factor contributing to self-sabotage is uncertainty. This uncertainty has a further route cause, anxiety. When you start to feel more anxious this can in turn affect your decision making and increases uncertainty itself. To avoid this uncertainty and have a much clearer mind, I have found journaling and using to-do lists incredibly useful.
By journaling twice daily alongside incorporating to-do lists in my journal; I firstly have a clear outlook for my day, and secondly, I have the pleasure of ticking off each goal giving me a little hit of dopamine. By ticking off tasks it creates momentum throughout my day.
4. Unclear Goals & Vision
This then leads me onto the fourth attribute of self-sabotage, unclear goals and unclear vision. In 2020 I listened to some audiotapes by Tony Robbins and he details the RPM acronym which stands for Result, Purpose and Mass Action. The result is what do you want, the purpose is the why do I want it and the mass action is what steps do I need to take to achieve this goal.
Now this above process was designed for goals, but I have utilised it in almost everything. By following this process I have greatly reduced self-sabotage from having a lack of clarity. Also taking the time to prepare and structure a task or goal greatly increases clarity. To further explain this point James Clear in Atomic Habits has 4 laws of habit formation. The first law is to make it obvious. My own interpretation of this law is to ensure clarity. If you are assigned a task at work for example and the task is unclear, this obviously isn’t your fault. Nevertheless, the choice to not obtain more information or guidance is.
5. Poor Time Management
Penultimately, one of the largest causes of self-doubt and sabotage is time management! We struggle to meet targets, our energy is drained from basic tasks and we feel like we haven't progressed with the big goals personally and professionally.
To eliminate self-sabotage, we must be conscientious of time. There are many things we can do to improve time management. I have already given the to-do list option but one step further is to daily order your tasks in rank of importance. I rank all my high cognitive tasks as a first priority in the day and accomplish these first. By following this step I don't get caught up with low cognitive tasks such as email. I have personally found if I start my day with email it’s ruined and so hard to repair. This is because I have no power over what comes into my inbox.
6. Not Doing What You Say
Lastly, I believe not doing what you say is a huge source of inner self-doubt and sabotage. I kept this one till last as it is the area I am personally working on most. I have also over time come to learn that this is a skill I can cultivate and constantly get better at.
As I have already mentioned journaling and todo lists are really helpful but a side effect of this structure is not doing what you set out to do. This can happen for multiple reasons such as being overly enthusiastic for your day (too many tasks), unanticipated work for a particular task, or your day changes due to unforeseen circumstances. This then leads to weakening your inner resolve and the mental impression of yourself dilutes so that you begin to believe you are incapable.
The solution is to start setting tasks which are easily accomplished. This then builds momentum and it is like the development of a muscle. You start with a lower weight and build intensity over time. If you start at your maximum weight and fail this really knocks your resolve. So start small and build upon that foundation.
Summary
In conclusion, there are many ways that we can sabotage ourselves. But equally, there are many more ways we can pick ourselves up. It is the process of self-improvement, and it is inevitable some days will be better than others. The approach I have come to take is to enjoy the bursts of creativity and motivation and to nurture in moments of doubt.
